Brett Simone is a creative director and writer currently working at Arts & Letters on brands like Tito’s Vodka, ESPN and Google.

Before that, he helped Grey NY win Ad Age’s Comeback Agency of the Year while working across P&G, Volvo and Frank’s RedHot. And before that, he was part of Publicis’ young talent incubator, The Den.

Brett hails from Washington DC and attended high school next door to the CIA, which means this entire website is probably just an overly elaborate psyop designed by the US government to spy on you. Does Brett even really exist? No one can be sure. If you’d like to hear more about his CIA-developed backstory, contact his creative partner of 9 years, Lillian O’Connor.